At point A traffic is slowing as it nears the obstruction ahead - all gaps are closing up, and drivers in lane three know the lane is closing.
At point B, traffic is slowing even further, and getting bunched up.
Drivers in lane three have less and less space to merge into....
until at point C the traffic in lanes one and two is often little more than a slow crawl at 15 - 20 mph if you are lucky. Drivers in lane three now have NO OTHER CHOICE but to merge, or park up in lane three.
Consequently, there is usually NO politeness, they simply barge in, causing lane two to slow dramatically, and allowing lane one to progress quicker than lane two.
This leads to frustration on the part of drivers in lane two, who have seen drivers who KNEW there was a requirement to merge, but who decided to get as far ahead as possible before they did so, thus slowing the lane even more than it was already.
At the back of the queue which builds up, lane two gets longer quicker - tempting more cars to bypass it using lane three - one usually being the first to fill up, and merely adding to the angst of the lane two drivers.
If you dont see a sign, it is understandable to use lane three, but once it becomes clear that lane three is closing, then you should merge as soon as it is safe to do so, and before the lane two drivers start to obstruct drivers in three through frustration.
It's no use quoting how it should be done - lane two drivers merely see those who continue on as selfish vermin, who deserve to spend the afternoon parked in front of the cones at point C!!
PLANNED obstructions such as contraflows usually allow for the use of the hard shoulder, and speeds generally remain higher than when the obstruction is a barrier repair, or an accident - however this problem is often seen at the M6 / M55 interchange during Blackpool lights season - where lane one is shown as filtering off to Preston and Blackpool, and the outside lanes continuing south. When an accident occurs, traffic merging becomes a necessity, and one which is handled badly IMHO, due to lack of forethought.