Safe Speed Forums

Meanwhile back at El Tone's pad--

Tone to mate (in best Blue Peter voice)"here's some spare parts I made earlier,and there's as much energy in them as in West Mids road safety policy "

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on

Ah.. memories of Leslie Judd.

I remember Val Singleton too but she was a bit too old for me.

For some reason Emma Peel wasn't

Oh - just me then?

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Roadworkers were asked for a show of hands if they thought speed cameras helped save their lives ;
"OK, so let's have a show of hands, please - ah yes that is 8 votes then!"

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

Should have gone to Specsavers


How did we nearly miss that one guys?

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Could it be that we went elsewhere ?

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on

Should have gone to Boots doesn't have the same ring though Botach

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

"The new system for 'sardining' drivers prior to transportation, gets underway" ...

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

As Calor merge with the manufaturers of Pelican crossings, experts warn that tough new jaywalking laws could be brought out, after succesful trials.

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

Local media report "In desperation when no one came forward for the Community Speed Spies, officials resort to manikins, but the scheme fails, when wind blow them off their feet, so now many bodies litter Council yards as seen here" ...

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

“Gigantic worm gets its own back by sprinkling men with salt and leaving them in the sun”.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

hey Tone, you can't win this one as well, no matter how well you know the competition organiser....lol

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

One figure to second "is it a plane,is it a pig or just a superhereo".
Second figure replies "no,it's the Galileo budget going through another ceiling"

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on

Yes, it’s Super Brunstom making the world a safer place with scameras. There he goes with a big ‘B’ on his chest, which of course stands for... (Bites lip )


Yeah I know

"Gigantic Graball gets his own back on Tone by sprinkling him with salt and leaving him out in the sun along with members of BRAKE".

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

“Four circus acrobats high on Crack don’t realise the girls have somersaulted off their hands and gone home”.

“Gok Wan gets How To Look Good Naked badly wrong”.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Inaugural meeting of the flying pig fanciers association demonstrating methods of pointing one out .

Service engineer ( to customer) , “As I said on the phone, Sir, that red LED is the standby indicator,and they're on standby ,when lit”

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on

TRL decide to use magnets on the road to guide cars but instead all these 'dumb' users got attracted !

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

I think we usually give these things about a month, so shall we say it finishes this Saturday 29th at 6ish?

“Saturday 29th at 6ish”


Okay then..

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

"A number of sleeping policemen have had to be scrapped after it was discovered they did not meet the ethnic diversity requirements of their force.
They are now in storage until a means can be found which allows them to be disposed of in a manner which meets all environmental legislation."

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Time to take responsibility for our actions.. and don't be afraid of speaking out!

"Four carbon men from the planet Zorb visiting Earth are held up at gunpoint and told to drop to the floor by dwarf man dressed as a cone".

You can’t see the gun because the cone man’s back is to us of course.

Ok, I’m scrapping the barrel now.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

I feel like there’s a clear winner and about ten second places Well I must say you were on fine form Ernest and I’m only sorry I can’t give a cash prize as well for



I liked this one from Pete on two levels





I have a vivid imagination so yours tickled me doobries too Grabs.



Thanks for partaking everyone and like I say it was tough one to decide after 1st place so really everyone else was second. Well done all and over to you I think Ernest

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.