Safe Speed Forums

Here goes..

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

"You can laugh madam but do you know you are going the wrong way, up a one way street"

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"I did say to the chief inspector, that having that Lotus patrol car last month was bound to have repurcussions."

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"yes madam, I know it was 9am this morning, when I clocked you speeding on the way to work but I've been chasing you ever since and it's not my fault, that you are now on your way home, before I caught up with you".

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"Yes, Madam, I know it's customary to ask you to sit in the patrol car,when you blow into the breathaliser but just this once, can I sit in yours ?"

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"No madam, I'm not hogging the middle of the road, I think that you will find that I'm taking the 'Primary position"

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"Yabba-Dabba-Dooo!"


"When I'm in pursuit, I have to turn off the B&Ts so the motor can get more power"

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Views expressed are personal opinions and are not necessarily shared by the Safe Speed campaign

"Well Officer as I say I just didn't see you behind me and thought the odd bluish flash was coming from my headset, still look on the positive side, as least you got a good workout this morning, and that's is good for your health !"

"OK Judge, I'll call for back up - why - well bit embarrassing really, I can't get out, it's a bit of a tight fit! It took me an hour to get the seat set right too!"

"Officer I do recommend them as they are so fast, and it would only take a couple and you'd go so much quicker!" "OK I'll see if I can pick up a couple of Huskies, sounds like it will help get my times down to incidents, that may help the Sergeant have me back in a RPU! thanks!"

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

"No madam, I'm not Noddy"

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

"Oh sorry officer, I had my bluetooth switched on and thought I'd connected with a model car"

You're hitting the floor running Grabs. Good on ya

Sorry Steve, no water opportunities here


Seriously now. Can we all please call a truce on other matters and join in as friends here, just for me? Think of it as the Great War if you like, where they came together at Chrismas and played footie. Pleeeese

We all have more in common than we have in difference.

Luv Tone.

It's looking great so far.

Ernest! Get online quick bud.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Looking at her hands.. "Oh officer Dibble I believe? I hear you're this big"

PC Dibble: "Let me take down your details. Name, address, when are you home alone?".

Sorry, again.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

I'd just like to put on record, Ma'am, my opinion that the Police Authority is all too willing to acceed to the demands of pressure groups like BRAKE these days!

1) Policeman
"Yep should make it home with that lot about 6. So it's donuts, peas, milk, butter, bread - large loaf, jam, OK anything else sweetie?"

2) Policeman
"So I'll put you down for a fiver then - yep doing Land's End to John O'Groats, now if I can just get you to sign the form, that I was here ... thanks"

3) Lady
"So officer you go straight down here then a right and then a left and then the Police Station is right in front of you! - Got that" and mutters "I dunno all these Police that rely on Sat Nav's!"

4) Lady
"Darling seriously if you think you're taking that home think again ! When you said you made the RPU Team, that was not what I thought you meant - really!"

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

(1) "On the down side, it only does 2000 miles to a set of tyres!"

(2) "The little boy who threw the egg was wearing a dark brown hoody, and his friend driving the getaway go kart had an Umbro logo on his track suit!"

(3) "No ma'am, low priority shouts like your missing cat no longer warrant a patrol car... unless your "cat" is a Jaguar!"

(4) "Thank you ma'am, when Ernest gets back from France we'll be asking him about the contraband alcohol and tobacco - and your missing dog!"

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Time to take responsibility for our actions.. and don't be afraid of speaking out!

Bringing it down to Tone's level and basing it on his observation of her hands..

" So, if a man driving a big car is an excuse for being small elsewhere...you must be this big"

...sorry folks , Tone's sense of humour is starting to rub off on me...

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

Lady: "I can see your blues but where are your twos?"

PC: "If you reach over here I'll let you feel them"



My mind's still in the gutter here Grabs.

_________________
The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Man....."Yep, you're right luv, I'm not a real copper, this is a police car that I made myself and I'm also the guy up the road, with a yellow birdbox in his garden, that looks like a gatso...for some reason though the police car doesn't seem to slow them down like the birdbox does...can't think why, can you?"

Lady,,,," You must be Good Driver Sam then!" ....anyone remember him?...lol

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

Come on guys! I feel like I've bought a dog and barking myself here I think I killed the Caption Compeition Claire. But I'm not one to give up without a pillow fight so...

"Oh it's a real police car madam, it was designed and built by BRAKE. It has a top speed of 10mph; 15mph if I've had a Red Bull".

"I'm sorry officer but I just can't take you seriously. I think it's that silly hat you're wearing"

PC says to lady, "You are under arrest for laughing at me without due care and attention"

Lady replies, "Awe come on officer, can't we talk about this back at my place over a tea or coffee?

PC replies, "Well maybe a coffee"

Lady replies, "Okay, you forc-offee.."



Get it? Sounds like 'You f..k Off...ee.


Oh never mind.

Throw me a bone here someone please.

_________________
The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

"And the BIG advantage is that I can now use cycle lanes"

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Only when ideology, prejudice and dogma are set aside does the truth emerge - Kepler

I've got a bone! Thanks Pete.

I probably shouldn't have said that

(In America it means something else, but that's probably too much information )

_________________
The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.