Safe Speed Forums

I know Road safety is a serious business but from time to time I come across something that makes me laugh. Maybe it is for the wrong reason but it still counts as humour. Perhaps we should have a forum for humorous postings.

Anyway I thought you would enjoy this picture. Just goes to show what happens when Bureaucrats are allowed to dictate road safety.

You had better make sure your clock is spot on when you stray into this school zone!


If anybody has got any funnies that they want to add to this thread please feel free to post here.

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Speed camera policy Kills

How about this for a speed limit...

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Speed camera policy Kills

Shameless plug for own website:

http://www.speedlimit.org.uk/gallery_funnies.html

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"Show me someone who says that they have never exceeded a speed limit, and I'll show you a liar, or a menace." (Austin Williams - Director, Transport Research Group)

Any views expressed in this post are personal opinions and may not represent the views of Safe Speed

Nice one...

How about:-

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Speed camera policy Kills

Its the future....

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Speed camera policy Kills

If only I had royalties for every time that picture of mine has been used



It is only a 40, btw, even though there are no buildings along the road for about 1½ miles.

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"Show me someone who says that they have never exceeded a speed limit, and I'll show you a liar, or a menace." (Austin Williams - Director, Transport Research Group)

Any views expressed in this post are personal opinions and may not represent the views of Safe Speed

Try this one --might need shortening - as Brucie might say -points mean prizes

http://www.warwickshire.gov.uk/Web/Corp ... 9500397767

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Time to take responsibility for our actions.. and don't be afraid of speaking out!

Love that, so simple but so funny!

This will explain where councils and scamer partnerships get their ideas from....

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Time to take responsibility for our actions.. and don't be afraid of speaking out!

Will Have To slow Down Then at NSL Signs Just In case

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RoADA Member -GOLD 2008
If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there.

Seen written on the rear of a motorway maintenance truck putting out cones -the name was painted , the rest was written in the dust

"CHEVRON - creating jams since 19xx"

A Lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Sheriffs Deputy.He thinks that he is smarter than the Deputy because he is sure that he has a better education.He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the deputies expense...........

Deputy says, "License and registration, please."
Lawyer says, "What for?"
Deputy says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign "
Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Deputy says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. License and registration, please."
Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Deputy says, "The difference is, you have to come to a complete stop, thats the law. License and registration, please!"
Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration and you give me the ticket, if not you let me go and no ticket."
Deputy says, "Exit your vehicle, sir"
At this point, the Deputy takes out his nightstick and starts beating the ever-loving crap out of the Lawyer and says:
"DO YOU WANT ME TO STOP OR JUST SLOW DOWN?"

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Time to take responsibility for our actions.. and don't be afraid of speaking out!

Bloke gets a job as a chauffeur, and after a few months, works his way up to a senior driver's position.
One day he is told to go and pick up a VIP at the airport - but it's a "bit of a hush-hush visit" so exercise discretion.
Lo and behold, there at the airport is the Pope!
His Holiness gets into the back of the Rolls, and admires the leatherwork, and interior, then says to Bloke "What's this thing like to drive? I used to enjoy driving a little car when I was a priest back in Poland, but since then, I've been driven everywhere, and really miss being behind the wheel."
Bloke says "no problem" and stops. Pope jumps into front seat, and bloke gets into back, and heads off down the motorway, at 100 mph!
Next thing, he is pulled over by a motorbike cop, who walks up to the car.
The Pope winds down the window, and plod walks back to his car, to radio for advice.
"I have caught a VIP speeding, what do I do?" he asks senior officer.
"What kind of VIP?"
"A VERY IMPORTANT VIP!"
"How important? A cabinet minister? A member of the Royal family? One of the Spice Girls?"
"Errrrr - I think it must be GOD! He's got the Pope driving him around!"

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Speed camera policy Kills

While we're on the subject of jokes:

A police officer stops a man who is driving his car with his wife in the passenger seat. The following exchange takes place....

The man says "What's the problem officer?"

Officer: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.

Man: No sir, I was going 65.

Wife: Oh, Harry. You were going 80.

[Man gives his wife a dirty look.]

Officer: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.

Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!

Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.

[Man gives his wife a dirty look.]

Officer: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.

Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.

Wife: Oh, Harry, you never wear your seat belt.

Man turns to his wife and yells: "Shut your damn mouth!"

Officer turns to the woman and asks, "Ma'am, does your husband talk to you this way all the time?"

Wife says: "No, only when he's drunk."

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"Show me someone who says that they have never exceeded a speed limit, and I'll show you a liar, or a menace." (Austin Williams - Director, Transport Research Group)

Any views expressed in this post are personal opinions and may not represent the views of Safe Speed

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Speed camera policy Kills

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Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler - Einstein

On zig zag lines too!

"IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I WAS WATCHING THE SPEEDO AND THIS PELICAN CROSSING LEAPT OUT ON IN FRONT OF ME!"

CAPTION: P.E.L.I.C.A.N
Police
Expert
Lost
It...
Complete
Absolute
Numpty

COULD YOU MAKE THIS A SAFESPEED FUNDRAISING TEA TOWL OR MUG...CHRISTMAS CARDS..